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A Valentine’s Poem About Trump’s Habit of Ripping Documents to Shreds

“He never stopped ripping things up”: Trump’s shredding of paper in the White House was far more widespread and indiscriminate than previously known and — despite multiple admonishments — extended throughout his presidency. — Washington Post, February 5, 2022

Trump didn’t follow the rules? Duh. But new misdeeds have been brought to light. In honor of Valentine’s Day, here is a poem highlighting his most recently discovered law-breaking actions.

Roses are red.

Violets are blue.

I am sick of Trump.

How about you?

Daffodils are yellow.

Daisies are white.

I can’t believe he is still here.

Why can’t Trump disappear into the night?

Orchids are beautiful.

Asters are blue.

Trump and misdeeds?

That’s nothing new.

Roses are dying.

Lilies make me gag.

He tore up documents.

And put them in a burn bag.

Carnations are stinky.

Just throw them in the dump.

Presidents must preserve documents.

But not Trump!

Chocolate can melt.

Ice cream will thaw.

“I do what I want.”

“I am above the law.”

Silver is sparkly.

Diamonds are forever.

Trump was told “No.”

He said, “Whatever.”

Briefings and memos.

Agendas and notes.

All to be ripped.

To the trash went the quotes.

To be a Trump staffer.

You needed clear tape.

Put the paper back together.

“I think that’s the right shape.”

If elected in 2024.

What crimes will he commit?

“I have the right to do whatever I want as president.”

So terrifying, I admit.

Valentine’s Poem originally published in MuddyUm humor