Are my eyes deceiving me? What did I just read? Hold onto your yoga mats because today, August 15, is National Relaxation Day! My first thought was, Is there a day for everything? And my second thought was, I guess the gardener across the street, the newspaper delivery guy, and the construction workers in the neighborhood did not get the notice.
I decided I must research this National Relaxation Day as it was new to me. I wondered who started this day and why. The first article that appeared in the Economic Times, gave some history:
William D. Chase was the founder of Chase’s Calendar of Annual Events. In 1985, his nine-year-old grandson, Sean Moeller from Clio, Michigan, proposed to make August 15, National Relaxation Day. The August 15, 1985, issue of the Des Moines Register quoted Moeller saying that people didn’t think enough about relaxing and that they thought too much about working.
It continues by stating the nine-year-old thinks people should “As a rule, avoid any kind of stress and engage in relaxing activities. Play video games or better, spend your day lying on your bed.” I wonder what that nine-year-old is doing today, as he would be a 46-year-old. Where is an investigative reporter to find the answers? I would make something up, but, remember, I am supposed to relax today.
Then I thought, I wonder how this National Relaxation Day will play out today across the country
(Starbucks employee to boss)
Employee: Sorry, Ms. Smith, I won’t be in today as it is National Relaxation Day.
Boss: By all means, take the day off. You deserve it. But we will continue to work so you can relax.
Employee: Well, now I just feel guilty. Okay, I’ll come to work. Never mind.
(Lifeguard at the beach reading a book)
Beachgoer: Excuse me, someone seems to be in trouble out there.
Lifeguard: Sorry, today is National Relaxation Day, and it says to read a book.
Beachgoer: Why didn’t you just take the day off? Shouldn’t you be paying attention to the safety of the swimmers and surfers?
Lifeguard: Oh, I couldn’t take the day off. No one to cover for me, so I’m relaxing on the job. People do it ALL the time.
Beachgoer: You have a point. Oh, never mind. That guy who was in trouble? Seems to have disappeared.
(14-year-old enters mom’s bedroom where she is lying on the bed )
Daughter: Ah, like, what’cha doing?
Mom: Today is National Relaxation Day, and one of the suggestions is to “spend your day lying on your bed.” You know that I am a rule follower, honey. I must stay in my bed and relax.
Daughter: But I have practice! Now, what do I do?
Mom: Oh, gosh. I don’t know. Figure it out. And shush, I’m relaxing. Oh, and can you unload the dishes, load the new dishes, wash the dog vomit off the throw rug, write checks for the gas and electricity, make appointments for annual physicals for you and your brother, schedule a bath for the dog, fill out the seven pages of back to school paperwork for you and your brother, plan meals, grocery shop for food for the week, shop for new school clothes, refill everyone’s prescriptions, oh, we are out of aluminum foil, and start thinking about Christmas presents.
Daughter: Ahhhh…
Mom: Fuck it. I’m up.
As I researched, I found a site, Days of the Year, which provides a calendar listing all the National Days of the year. I discovered today is not only a day to relax, but it is also National Acadian Day (to celebrate the history and culture of the historical colony of Acadia in Canada), National Check the Chip Day (to check your pet’s microchip), and National Lemon Meringue Pie Day. As a pie lover, I can definitely get behind the meringue pie idea.
Reading this made me think there must be a celebration for everything, kind of like a participation award in sports. As I looked at the calendar, I thought, I haven’t written a blog in a while. This seems like a totally funny blog piece. I thought I would make fun of the calendar and add some crazy, absurd days. Hilarious. It didn’t take more than one search for me to discover that I couldn’t create anything crazier than what was already listed.
The Days of the Year website displays a searchable calendar, and I started my search with my birthday.
November 12
- National Chicken Soup for the Soul Day, which is basically advertising for the Chicken Soup for the Soul series
- National French Dip Day, which is my least favorite sandwich but obviously, someone likes them
- World Pneumonia Day, which sounds like a threat but probably is a real possibility after what our world has been like lately
- Fancy Rat and Mouse Day, which I am not making up, and I hate rodents, so I find this particularly disturbing on MY birthday
- National Happy Hour Day, I think to cope with all the fancy rats and mice honored on this day
- National Pizza with the Works Except for Anchovies Day, which made me think, do we really need a day for this? I can’t make this stuff up.
So, check out the website and see what absurd “National Day” of items are celebrated on your birthday. I’ll be lying on my bed playing video games. At least for one minute before someone in my house yells, “Mom? Mom? Where are my forms for school? MOM!!”
Happy Relaxation Day to you!
Published in MuddyUm.